blessings // buttons y'all ~ here is where you can push the buttons of meaning and poetic interpretations of angel & angle windows of insight. peek around, there's a lot to see. (you may discover a key) For me? To sew is bestow! (buttons are like seeds) my aim is to frame THAT name : my sight is to ignite and thus write N2 PARADISE CLARITY. (for what is understanding if not for the s3arch & struggle to get there?)
Wait (Weigh) The Minute! TyPo Or FaiTh (Fate)? IS OUT NOW FOR YOUR LISTENING PLEASURE!
This Audio book is the first of which i’ve ever done and the LONGEST project I created , running in at 2 hours and 12 minutes and 40 seconds! it makes sense it would be about the length of a feature film! this is also a project i’ve been working on for the last 5 years. My first book (Paradise Clarity) is a poetry opus of 460 pages conceptualizing the framework behind my writing since 2013.
Whereas, this book is a recorded notion of my past, present, and future. It speaks to the awareness that comes with being balanced about the things that happen to us on in our journey through life.
This book has 3 narrations : First of which is narrated by Balaam’s Don_Key found the scripture in Numbers Chapter 22 wherein Balaam is stopped in his tracks after his donkey ‘BRINGS HIM TO HIS ATTENTION ON WHERE HE IS GOING. ESSENTIALLY, HIS DONKEY MADE A TYPO* OF HIS USUAL FATE. Secondly, it loosely follows the life of Tomson who grew up in a Pentecostal Holiness Church of God in Christ. Much of which is my personal story (alongside with many who’ve had similar experience with the church.) Lastly, this is an audio search, which attempts to explain the reactions of such dispositions of both the Angle and Angel!
May you enjoy and listen in your own time!
TABLE CONTENTS (LIST OF CHAPTERS) : 00:29-01:24
INTRODUCTIONS: ANGLES, ANGELS, & THE DON_KEY -: 01:25-04:19
ASLEEP // ALARM: 4:20 – 8:25
(CHAPTER 1: OVER HERE? AIN’T OVER THERE!) : 8:26-18:01
(CHAPTER 2: DIFFERENT LENS, DIFFERENT PENS) : 18:03-24:20
(CHAPTER 3: WORLDS WITHIN THE WORLD) : 24:21-38:03
(CHAPTER 4: TELL HIM YES!) : 38:04-50:35
(CHAPTER 5: TRANSITION OF TRADITION): 50:37-1:09:35
(CHAPTER 6: CONGREGATIONAL SONG? ALL TOGETHER NOW!) : 1:09:37-1:16:08
(CHAPTER 7: TITHES AND OBLIGATIONS) : 1:16:09-1:26:18
(CHAPTER 8: THE BIBLE BELT) : 1:26:20-1:33:30
(CHAPTER 9: TRIPPING ON YOUR TRIP?!) 1:33:31-1:42:58
it’s going but it’s coming right through me piercing: like a damned paper cut lemon twist and a salty nut ruin my pain on the inside overflowing with thoughts, exposing what ought if bought by pride it’s not just one thing but a colored ring while the colorless will to create has found its mate by slipping away all day traveling but by a nameless guidance reverting depending on a shadow bent, caught flirting i recognize this shouldn’t be true which is why i’m writing it out : to find the second or replicated hue.
i don’t understand ? it doesn’t land! did you mean that word or am i to assume a duplicitous scene? is the grass green or are you making it obscene? and so on and so forth. is it like the sound of a train or more of a melodic morning rain?
in spite this : my tears do not always revere what’s been taken from me. crying from the inside to embarrassingly : figure out what’s left to be done, when the sun shines on a part-time run.
crushed like a pillar on the eve of mountain, pennies wishing into every fountain. as rivers are depleted, the pull requests that i be seated, instead my sadness is repeated.
what’s really standing in the front?
“you can’t see the forest, for the trees especially if you’re asking on your knees! demand and reprimand as to affirm your line! you ain’t gotta hold it ALL in your mind, may your lip bring the drip so that they ain’t caught like a banana and easily slip!”
though it rains heavy, my clothes were not ready. especially them shoes, they got it the worst. but it was my backpack that learned it first. a mass soak up. it was like everything needed to be washed and made clean. even as the water did not redeem, or so it seems?
y’all ever met anyone that starts everything with a negation? it’s a tRiP!
it’s always nah, nope, and no with them. “you know eye see your point truly, but i don’t think it’s just that.” i think i know where you’re getting at, but i’d argue : it could be that too but i don’t think it’s JUST that. even if you’re not saying that, it’s also implied that this is the situation. i don’t know where you’re getting at but i am saying no. it ain’t just that. from what you just replied, nah…i’ll say this :
there’s truly a lot to be sad about when you take the tRiP to read and pay attention to the things around you. there’s indeed a tRiP in every day experiences. for the masses of humanity, we are experiencing deep pain via global oppression by capitalism, imperialism, and patriarchy. most of us are too shy to talk about the deep pains we experience in our lives, because for 1) we are socialized to individualize our problems and remain in our own vacuums . 2) being told that we should not burden anyone with our personal misfortunes. 3) Pull yourself up by your own bootstraps and don’t talk about things that make us uncomfortable. However, it is when we take the initiative to be willing to struggle with folks that brings about respect and dignity.
IT’S JUST OUR PAIN!!!
it’s the actual pain that keeps us attentive as to why we are alive. one of my favorite lyrics that often goes through my head is “tears and rain are all the same, the only way to win this game – is to let everybody play and share the ball.” – Lavaux
Not enough pain is being shared and that’s definitely part of the problem. Tripping over various dips on the surface and below. There’s certainly a cause and effect. A relationship exists between the ‘hear’ and ‘there’ and this is ultimately everywhere! looking into the reasons while acknowledging the passing seasons.
dedicated to all the tRiPs and DiPs sent to make us sLiP…
caring wears a visible garment. love being an action word, that means it is most realized when in motion / demonstration. ideas set in mind only, ain’t got nothing on the tangible material. reality responds to a set of conditions which dictate the frame and name of any particular phenomena.
the all seeing eye does not spy but it does try
figuring out what set you off into this abyss a clown’s kiss regarded as a pleasurable mischief
entering into crowns & tiara’s glory should mean a head being chopped off – cuz’ that’s a class struggle story.
like a cat tickling the glass lofty bushes will fall, & when this inevitably comes to pass: will you go to the party or a parade in the green grass?
as you left the party, that was throwing confetti by breaking away first, as if to start but you still ain’t ready
darn the surprise and damn those eavesdropping eyes melodic boom bombs ministered to me in psalms
with every page i was radiated by their finesse their soliloquy fully weighted with a thin press could it be either their style? or delicate galloped mile?
everywhere they went? my change quickly spent! (as in) easily transformed with focused attention to their scent, while unselfishly paying rent
a smile wide as the moon frown as arduous as using a fork instead of a spoon making the differences difficult to reconcile
feeling impatient while waiting in line:
“can i get 10 breakfast platters, with extra biscuits and honey?” said the mf in front of me at the fast food joint, they probably didn’t order that much but the wait proved a ridiculous point.
the metrics upon my thoughts land in a planned dream you appeared in a multicolored dress i confess: it was tempting when you came my way in the midnight gray when you suspected my thoughts were distant reminded of our touch which subconsciously i missed very much even as long ago weeps for a much desired sleep action is misplaced on the table of distant seas waters placing us a part while the heart attempts to start my standing still wishes for you to move near to alarm my every symphony so that my vision can hear the word spoken back then, i still understood when we lived in the same neighborhood i neglected the requested chance i was too nervous to dance embarrassed by your movements and step i kept all my rhythm enclosed until the water flowed to the seeds, i then arose froze but dripping to the splendid occasion wherein this invasion became translucent (upon the metrics of these same thoughts : this summary of a melodic swoon my fullness was regarded as the moon walking like mj backwards to the stolen tune yet we sang with fascination, admiration & rightful sensation! (memories restores faith and hope; the contradiction in this is that : memories needn’t be rushed to be created.)
Acknowledge the space around you and LOOK at those FACES, in public SPACES! Let your EYES : REALIZE, the activity of your surroundings! Notice the detail, and take sight at the array of any possible dismay Pay attention to what’s happening!
Get out the way (or stand in the way) of a flammable aggression Put pride in your steps and alert yourself to the upcoming succession! Be a student to the way of the odd smirk! AgAin : set your feelings aside & commit to doing the work!
Can’t you hear them :beating those tambourines DOWN? it’s all AROUND! Trembling SOULS flustered but they still sound like prayerful mediation Tibetan BOWLS all of the while they are harmonizing between their FLUTES & anointed BOOTS ! attempting to make a WiLd SCENE cuz the GREEN stays OBSCENE !
(You’d think i’m being MEAN!)
it’s starting to look frfr aBsUrD : the performance is the DRIP that was once a SLIP N2 the action that gave it all the LIP. it’s a TRIP! Now y’all probably gonna be exhausting trying to connect all the RHYMES and TIMES you once heard, how you could fly or float. irrespective of the algorithmic ILLUSION or the perplexing CONFUSIONS parroting as GOLD. It’s all still SHINNY & WHINNY due to all the lies that are TOLD. I AM MISSING MY MAKEUP! A face that needs to ‘BEAT-IT’ like Yum on the STREETS. Consider me in HEAT as i show up as the GOO to the end of your SHOE. SURPRISE Mother fuc****! i’m the GUM that returns your face twisted, in sight, & NUMB. Because they decided to spot you; by artificial and AI sequenced WIRE. burning by FIRE hot as NERVOUSNESS is at your SERVICE. SENSITIVE cuz this is a FESTIVE ITCH. Like a Content WITCH on a broom stick. like the CLOCK contradicting the TICK TOCK. but yet? scrolling ENDLESSLY. You care not to take IT ALL IN? To fizzle out and SPIN. because you’ve been curated to a menu of potential ENDS. being hosted by superfluous FRIENDS . You hAve laughed yourself WELL! So, take a SWELL, gallop into the deep dirt ROADS. DON’T YOU feel THOSE poly rhythmic CODES? listen as they are blowing with the mist of the black and white KEYS. now PLEASE: understand this was an intentional long extended word salad, intending to CONVEY what you SHOULD HAVE GUESSED ANYWAY!
“what was once a party is a frivolous CHARADE until a festival PARADE revealed it all to be, an ambiguous MASQUERADE !!!”
speaking softly to the village dame he requested that he be chosen to play her game odds and perpendicular chances were in his favor desiring the allure of her symphonic narration and for the tour of her harmonic salvation to be met with a qualified or undignified correction (even if it meant subjection or rejection!)
this was his fate at odds by an uneven gate broken belonged to the lock, though pigeons remained on top with a wailing gawk superstitious anomalies affirmed vacant policies none bearing the condition of a playable rendition NOT TO MENTION: this is what perplexed him the most their sway held in the everyday of her disarray , eager for aligned scenes with multi-lingual tongues from the south and to the north of queens
if one could redeem a summary that is a recovery of time spent, sleeping indifferences would allow transgressions the space to vent his longing for the belonging of qualified amends may lend to slanted cut pieces cuffed by enemies instead of friends
returning back to the neighborhood of playmates and athletic ends meant being denied the sport and the elasticity which guaranteed material bends
the risk of being dismissed became the challenge accepted as with a chaste and hardened heart, wisdom afforded the incumbent appeal, neglected
futuristic fantasy…where the ***💜**** party people be!
the sigh that lent unspoken words, no one has ever heard. whispered prose which stirred sought to answer the blank space.
Featuring a scandal made righteous:
come here! You righteous scandal, I think you are a bit more to handle!
But I’m willing to catch you, if you stand in the way of getting got.
cuz’ you’re smoking hot _ I rather be denied than to not be given any chance.
to imagine of our sweaty dance – it may be a proven “righteous scandal.”
a candle much too hot, that soon it’ll burning.
melting by the woe of learning.
how can’t eye see? what’s lit up right in front of me.
I have no choice according to the inner doubting voice.
but my eyes clothes with fashionable express, textures and buttons draped with incomparable dress.
a feeling I can’t compare, as your colors endeavor to void the unfair.
if given the opportunity , I’d renew my immunity
to refrain from the masquerade in order for a fair trade N2 a memorial street, even with callused feet – I’ll greet your direction to a formulated and poetic perfection. (even if it meant potential rejection!)
your bounce is far to like jelly. it’s making me realize why eye turn off the telly.
choosing to instead read what lies in between.
as nuance reveals what all of it may mean…
like a multi-colored photo book, my mind is far too curious to NOT look.
those succulent thighs, make me yawn thirst trapping sighs.
natural to my instinct , I can’t help but think into a deep fantasy.
basically? my testimony is a desired ceremony in a transitional rhapsody !
featuring both you and I congregated together in full supply…
“Umm, if you are clocking in, you would need to use the other computer, yeah the one inside … THANK YOU!”don’t say thank you. say EXCUSE ME or i beg your pardon, or simply F*CK YOU. because that’s what you mean. from your posture – to the very attitude that embodies your demeanor. every trace of your fallen grace is SEEN. you didn’t have to spell it out to me, Karen. clearly you missed your morning errands. that is until i showed up : first in line – to be shouted at with your raging tempered stance. at first glance : i thought not to ever dare come over your way. the only thing that prompted me was my usual computer to clock in, satellites within, went thin. i analyzed in my thoughts whether i should even acknowledge the morning as good cuz surely whatever i assumed – you calculated onto me as hood! yes, i had to go there because i’m African!
me dreadlocks are long twisted and thick. (verifying in you , all the variables for the all the ticks to click!). meanwhile your fluorescent gaze is steadily amazed at my appearance. in your mind: it would be better resolved for me, if i was a product on clearance! a sale that is promised because the FINE LETTERING DECLARED IT EXACTLY THREE NINETY NINE! did i miss the sign? or am i deaf and blind? it wouldn’t matter to you even if i had a disability- for, your inability to transcribe tranquility is at influx with your raging hostility! & why is this? because i dared to clock in on the computer next to you that you were not occupying? you’d think – i’m lying ! but you said ‘THANK YOU’ so loudly – as if i were entrusting you with a gift. and why would that ever be the case? this was comparable to a flower being stolen from the soil and put into a ceramic vase. for nothing else matters : even when the glass shatters into feathered tatters. you wouldn’t dare to sweep up the pieces of what remains left behind. preferring rather, to grin kind & (with passive aggressive tenacity) the mere caudacity!
i’m welcomed to my own own envelope party! yeah! yeah! yeah! writing letters at the seams multiple colored dreams fantasies and a spelled out intention reading it all out, so that all could be mentioned
tearing open the paper for a surprise the secret in here to advise ::: the reconciliation is closed i supposed it was because the bridge could not be crossed apparel sequencing nonetheless flossed the steps removed and tossed anchoring exploitation is the name ‘bossed’ by recurring screens littered in the eyes of incapable means
when wishing to dethrone the idea of home, my expectations sprint like the legends of rome. emblematic of an extravagant moonlight affair, my apparel crafted a tailored flair. dismissing the evidentiary notion. seeking rivers or oceans instead. as the bed doesn’t lie. the mind can cry opposed to the big picture but verified by in nuance.
seeing what’s caught in between. but begging for the green to be worn like jeans. understood are the roles played. they can’t all relay because their actions play a part. contradictory elements within the genes . bullying the pressure to let go and release the SCREAM. all over and on and on. composed in note and pattern without the visitation of exact correlation or by the planet Saturn!
(this poem / song came to me in a dREaM. i was at my old church, and there were multiple envelops thrown into the air while this song was being sang by the congregation. the dREaM ended by me being toppled over by a woman who sat on me after the last note was harmonized. very colorful indeed but i don’t know what it could mean?) 😂😅🤣
embraced by the supplication of your face your canvas, strokes are embedded with grace my appetite requests plural and singular taste fed by the mercies of your wish your pallet contains variations of flavors to dish with your laughter being a festive occasion and that smile stirring all the persuasion it’s no wonder : i have been summoned as a timeless recall, at a futuristic dream ball dancing by the beat of your clairvoyant signature i hope to be extended as your acceptable visitor ringing like your heart while singing: songs draped as sonnets and meaningful conjecture enough definitions and rhymes that’ll soon lecture… Not into sleep, but unto passages of paragraphs that’ll keep you kept into the deep if you’re wondering what all of this may mean? pay attention to my intention to make you scream as i shout: powers and seasonal flowers that may awaken your planted tree with rain and gain, until you can clearly see i’m on a roll, as i measure the graph around your whole every part of you, wrapped like cellophane on a prestigious gift my rift is a draft, encouraging you to pass with humor that’ll make you laugh carrying weight from your outstretched hand collecting all the specs of sand holding onto you with a promised note while floating to your hidden canals with my love boat consider this a cruise, one in which i heal your every bruise kissing softly the sprain, so that like a train you understand how my language is tracked with luggage already packed irrespective of the transportation this narration may become too much, but that’s the danger of surrendering to your touch while looking to name this piece in honor of your PERSONALITY FEAST i think of your beauty revealed by prayers of the holiest priest which is to say : your glory reaches to my inner poetic story sometimes too long and abstract to be said, but you’re in my spirit like fine wine awakens the dead
(THIS POEM IS DEDICATED TO THE NAME OF THE BUTTERY PECAN : MAY IT SERVE YOU AS YOU HAVE SERVED ME! 🧈🦋🌟)
seasonal depression is in session the calamity is sizzling in the booth like a rotten and spoiled tooth cold to the touch ailments swollen & such formation takes a scolding seat malnourished and empty is the street past is left open like a twisted rope barefoot in journey seeking hope while summoned to the river naked and exposed, there i stood in a shiver like the roots planted next to me engulfed by the wind and tree before i knew it, i jumped with my flesh slumped inside the cold water an underground battle became a deep slaughter pierced by the freeze shaken by blistering leaves i’ve fallen and only desire sleep though these waves thrust me deep and my dreams creep remnants remain floating at the top the lighthouse flickers as though it may stop with the shine on the line and my mind crossed yet another time for this reason i wish this season to be dismissed as i drown remiss…
This is a conversation, (May of 2022) I had with my dear friend Sannia! She shares her story about growing up in the church and how her ‘Angles and Angels’ contrast to mine. Listening back, I noticed, I did a lot ranting over the topic :p but Sannia adds a delightful perspective which puts in context our rightful place in examining where we are. May you receive something good out of this!
The first part of my interview with Keti, is available now for your listening / watching pleasure! it was so wonderful to be able to have this conversation and share some of my foundation behind my recent book ‘Wait / Weigh The Minute! TyPo oR fAiTh? Keti is an amazing philosopher and artist whose skills and talents speak for themselves! Check her channel out and subscribe for future endeavors !
in the backyard of my confusion, lied a remedy buried deep. Hidden far away, where even the soil keepers have fallen asleep. locked away as a time capsule, with a sturdy and indifferent axle. And absurd words tweeted by flightless birds.
one or two from three and nine : a stage to mine. encrusted with the rust of the earth. faced with festivals of mirth. saddled by the passages of my struggle fence. I stand in court as the devil’s advocate-seeking recompense! for my living right, avoiding the night, shadows hiding in plain sight!
far back alongside the distant seas! scented flowers and trees blow with a breeze, gathering my attention. not to mention the rhyme slime. that’s probably already a grind to your ears as an annoying past time. shooting stars , passing cars : energy misplaced _ fitness gone to waste. broken on the spine, foundation soon to be base.
but….
maybe i’ll walk with a oak shillelagh, in hope that my step will be careful and true.
maybe i’ll dance with a wooden canopy while yodeling on the who!
maybe i’ll plunge with a strong and sturdy stick to penetrate through the concrete brick.
maybe i’ll be ran over by the impatient ones in the grocery aisle, with vampire teeth as their smile.
maybe i’ll count the time it takes to be 10/10 fine.
maybe i’ll mount the stacks on a dime.
maybe i’ll have a stable case to shoot the mace.
right inside their eye, a bright fiery potion, swallowing inside their ocean.
sheeeit, maybe ill strut with an oak shillelagh, and beat my drum with my wand and ukulele.
i have overstayed my welcome! should’ve been gone but now i’m on my way as here? is not over there! but it’s somewhere, a space on the line, like a frostbite in the mind! or a shackled image caught in between time…
forward ever to the ongoing change, left inside the collected jar. from near and afar. coin may reside, in thin pockets or within a hidden corner tide. clouds are transitory mysteries, containing ancient and new found histories!
anyways…
Any as in: IN KNEE. which stands… in the way, cuz the day is full of gray! a message that can potentially relay!
ever wondered what that could be? with eyes that can’t see. & intentions paved in hell. irrespective of the noise of the bell!
i looked in the mirror and noticed the sleep around my eyes, tears encrusted as tired lullabies… so : i ran the water, to set the starter!
now the essence of my current flower, makes a wish to be empowered (and devoured) by a hungry appetite.
with magnifying insight, my desire runs a surface lap! superfluous cycles sprinting around the map, like a mouse finding the house. or a buzz against the fuzz.
for when both are in want, they can’t help but flaunt, all of their desires laid clearly on the table! touching and seeing, in fact : ALL of their sensors set the match to the fable!
& the burn to return. leaves smoke and ash. they’ve been burned and smashed! no longer here, but transported through the seasons, as if you ever needed a sensible reason?
let’s start with this one : this rhyme is not yet undone ! cuz i wish for all the fun! my crass abilities are sensibilities that ain’t scorn, they’re only roses without the thorn!
a pain nonetheless, cuz the smell is rotten! like picked cotton ! laid out and embroidered like a quilted sheet. with colors and textures providing all the heat!
i find it curious, that when folks check in on you, they continue with wonder: “how have you been? what have you been up too? long time no talk too, what’s been happening?” however, those same people can’t / wouldn’t / haven’t – taken anytime to press play to engage in your latest creation.
🤔🧐🤨
if you want the message to relay; indeed all you need to do is press play and LISTEN! (i would really appreciate your feedback / criticisms especially if you make it through the whole thing!
this project was originally released 2 years ago as a written text, featuring 10 chapters with a lot of colorful poetry and allegory. i’ve done the difficult arrangement of writing, editing, and recording it all. There’s no ‘physical’ copy of this book yet because i really want folks to listen as opposed to flipping through the pages and missing something.
Typos notwithstanding, there’s a message! May you get through! Whether through the Angel (😇) or Angle (📐)
Blessings and thank you for everyone that has taken the time! This was done at no cost to you, but if you wish to give a love token and donation :
Today : is a day of mourning. with the falling rain & ongoing pain…indeed today is one of deep lamentation. if you’re wondering why, there’s a creeping sadness around this season? may it better recognized one reason for this is : the capitalist nature of this holiday.
while the mass media and all of their related pundits aim to reframe today as one of celebration and giving of thanks. amidst the football, cake and pie stuffing, turkey and ham feasts, little to no mind is given to the nature of this day.
Instead we’re forced: Football. Advertisements. Black Friday Sales. the message has been sent. encouraging the tenet to pay rent. but there ain’t no money. only waffles without honey. big time flakey, crumbling…steadily shaky.
one may vaguely point to the native and indigenous peoples; but little depth or investigation is made to their history and what efforts have been made to undermine them and their relentless struggle in gaining their land back!
I AM CONVINCED : not enough pain has been shared amongst the masses of those in ‘ameriKKKa’ / Canada / and all occupied and colonized lands…we’re only left to focus on the remnants of what remained. THIS IS THE CANARY EFFECT.
Not a day of thanksgiving but THANKS-TAKING of LAND, RESOURCES & LABOR which were all stolen, revised, and redirected for the purposes of capitalist exploitation and hegemonic dominance.
when eye look at the the full moon tonight, I’m reminded how my life was changed this day 7 years ago at Paisley Park. i’ll never forget that conversation and feeling. it was spiritual, all aglow, and all encompassing : much how the moon has 8 phases, various stages in between.
This was a night of correction _ a reminder of where I was standing.
i’ve never seen myself as much of a ‘fan’ but appreciator and admirer of his music. it was very clear i admired and some may say even ‘ADORED’ Prince’s music. (Shoutout toThe One!) ❤
I downloaded /purchased all of his (and related) albums and remembered all the lyrics! the music just connected with me. it’s like Prince knew how to ensure all the instruments including silence, we’re always so clear to hear and feel. to this day, truly i am moved. something about that Purple Music!
it was this night where i gave a private tour of paisley park alongside with TrevorGuy to journalists from Europe (pictured above) it was also announced to me for the first time that, Prince would be doing a solo Piano and Microphone Tour all across Europe in 3 weeks!
Alongside with MonoNeon (Bass Guitar) Donna Grantis (Guitarist) , Adrian Clutchfield (Sax & ewi) , and Kirk Johnson (Drums). As for my position? I‘d be working the teleprompter! he assigned me this position because he had watched my videos and was aware of my knowledge of his music and aware that i could keep up with his sudden musical transitions.
this was all so unbelievable to accept. And while this ultimately did not occur due to Ticket Scalping, and him deciding to have the first show at Paisley Park – the mere invitation was enough to transfix my anticipation.
amidst my glory and elation : it was reminded to me by Prince himself _ “You are in this position because you carry a light, you needn’t be shocked; you are here because you belong here!” i had smack myself out the fog of disbelief – it’s like nah man, take another look of what you have and USE IT! You don’t need to be surprised, just go with a smile and do the work!
Share your light and don’t hide it – ‘LIVE OUT LOUD‘ was after all the first song that I received from him in an email. it all became clear to me and my figuring out became glorified, it was like I had seen and walked into the light. Only after being guided by a mentor and oracle. I remember smiling and holding onto this revelation because it was that exact affirmation that encouraged me to continue with my soon to be released project ‘Characters In The Wind‘ which was going to be in New Zealand of that next year in 2016.
It all came at once, much like this memory. I’ve just returned from seeing Metallica in Hollywood, Florida! I’ve been listening to Metallica for about a year now and this being my 3rd show of theirs : it was an amazing experience. Much of it reminded me of how it was like being in the Prince community however this scene is totally different! Ha! They’ve been around for over 40 years and the sound just hits you. Especially when you peep into the different changes they’ve experienced throughout their career. The show I attended was for the ‘Trues’ as it was only songs played from their first two albums on the MegaForce label : ‘Kill Em’ All & Ride The Lightning’.
It was a special experience and I got to share it with my dearest friend, comrade, and sing-out loud to bad songs homie: jamilah! it was a electrifying night with vibrational intensity. From the conviction in Lars Ulrich drum playing, to the emblazoned passion in Kirk Hammett’s guitar playing. Matched with the throbbing resolution of Rob Trujillo’s bass guitar playing, harmonized with James Hetfield’s rhythmic guitar swagger – they bring something signature and sincere.
Experiencing music is all about connecting to the thing which can’t always be explained. It causes you to re-evaluate where you stand in the great congregation of life. All Together Now! (more or on that later in the Upcoming audio book!)
Everyone on this planet has value and importance. Don’t let this backwards system of Capitalism convince you otherwise ! they are constantly feeding us lies all based in individual and backwards ideology that serves only the interests of empire. We can and should work together, how else can we build if we are stuck in our own individual vacuums struggling in silence?
to hell with that! Realize you are a social being. you are breathing air. you desire community! all of us do. even introverts who prefer the company of themselves, still understand the necessity of contact with the other. it can’t be just you. it’s not just you. it’s never just one person.
Connecting with all of the forces that join in harmony is what this struggle is about. It’s not going to be easy because correction is hard to swallow for a lot of folks. Why? Because of liberalism. For those who do not know what Liberalism is a great text on this is by Mao Tse-Tung : in Combat Liberalism he writes:
“To let things slide for the sake of peace and friendship when a person has clearly gone wrong, and refrain from principled argument because he is an old acquaintance, a fellow townsman, a schoolmate, a close friend, a loved one, an old colleague or old subordinate. Or to touch on the matter lightly instead of going into it thoroughly, so as to keep on good terms. The result is that both the organization and the individual are harmed. This is one type of liberalism.”
THIS IS WHAT WE HAVE TO FIGHT EVERY DAY! Because we are all trained and socialized to be liberal on maters. Conflict avoidant. “I don’t talk about X Y Z” All of these avoidances are a result of how the system of capitalism trains us to silence ourselves when we are confronted with truth. We have to fight against that and struggle for a better world.
ALL of that to say : looking at the Full Moon reminded me of some of these notions to also weigh the minutes that have been counted before me! It has been written and said. I’m basking in the glow, the fullness that is to know.
all i’m saying is : a lot is about to change! (👛⛅️🛣️)
WAIT (W3IGH) THE – MINTUTE! TYPO OR FAITH (FAT3)? COMING SOON!
dammit i’m mad! (read it backwards) 😂 but still excitingly glad to report much progress is being made on my upcoming audio book ‘WAIT / WEIGHT THE MINUTE ! TyPo Or fAiTh/ FATE ? as it turns out recording chapters of your own words is more challenging than one would imagine. all of lines changing and times rearranging rhymes. this project is both spiritual and mathematical thus various contradictions appear. (here and near) transitions // tradition
sinister // minister
last days // last daze!
But through the work, many correlations are nonetheless teachable moments. It’s all aligned // It’s not so Bad but then again it is not just BAD but BBBBBBBAAAAAAADDDDDDD!
YOSOGO: May you enjoy the different variations of BAD with this playlist!
WHY YOU WANNA TREAT ME SO BAD ? – Prince // In this case ‘Bad’ is just how it sounds. just down wrong. when I treat you so good, but you treat me so bad. that ain’t right yo!
2. WHY DOES IT HURT SO BAD? – Whitney Houston // Back to feeling Sad, thought I let it go, why does it hurt me so?
3. BAD REPUTATION – Donna Summer // Always think twice! Don’t throw your love away and get into public arguments and reactionary interactions. Your reputation can’t be brought or sold but higher to this point ::: Trust your Instinct and LISTEN!
4. BAD BAD NEWS – Leon Bridges // Everything about this is smooth and lifting. The power of transitory style and grace when people get in your face. Bad bad news? nah, I’m about to turn it n2 a good thing.
5. YOU’VE GOT IT BAD – Stevie Wonder // This song is a trip. included with this song is : the flight, destination, and passing duties to ensure you a safe land. The view is ‘O’ so marvelous, so good the bad becomes good. She’s so bad, it’s good!
6. BAD – Michael Jackson // I’m Bad!! you know it AND THE WHOLE WORLD HAS TO ANSWER RIGHT NOW TO TELL YOU ONCE AGAIN : I’m So bad, I’m Smooth!!!
7. AMERICA HAS A PROBLEM – Beyonce // Beyonce sampled this song from Kilo Ali’s song (America Has A Problem (Cocaine) She changes the meaning and says : well the problem is actually her cuz she’s ‘Bad’.
“20, 40, 80, out the trap, hit it with the rap Put it on the map, then we right back Call me when you wanna get high, high, high, high Tony Montana with them racks Ivy P on my bag, double G’s on the dash I’m bad, I’m bad Tell me when you wanna get high, high, high, highBoy, you can’t get higher than this No ‘Cause love don’t get no higher than this No, no”
Now one can for sure criticize this song for its hyper glamorization of why she’s ‘Bad’. Exploitation is definitely in the bag not just birkins and teflar bags. you can’t get racks and billions without taking from those that do the labor to make that possible. That’s the fundamental contradiction in this song, America Does Have A Problem and that’s capitalism and the violence that is required in order to sustain its existence. So how about we get ‘high’ on political education and organization that gives us the focus to change the material realities around us. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
In this video: I sew 14 buttons on a new pair of *BLUE DENIM LEVI JEANS* something, I never thought I’d ever wear again. 24 minutes of mostly ASMR motion. The results were satisfactory and the therapy was needed. Hence the silence, for the majority of this video. This was a very much an ASMR inspired video. No whispering but careful attention to where I was going with the needle and thread.
This is the result @ ::: 23:16 – 23:38
Blue Jeans For Work3 (2 hole buttons) on the one going down!
Much more coming: BE OUT ON A LOOKOUT FOR PART 7 HERE!
we are living in a CRUMB SOCIETY, numb to sobriety but constantly fed with intoxicated waste renewing the insatiable taste. skyscrapers in the city, with flashing lights and parking entrances lit pretty. surrounded by security brick walled fences, spyware and firewalls for instance: while surveillance is factored in, just like a factory setting comes programmed from within. production is on the line, labor exploitation becomes the pantomimed. puppets and strings, relationships or flings? like CRUMBS, falling from the bite of the cookie, mere CRUMBS. that’s what we are offered. ALSO BECAUSE THAT’S WHAT THEY WANT US TO SEARCH FOR. WHO IS “THEY’? = They are the capitalist and corporate ruling class; the same ones doing all the stealing, and the wheeling of propaganda to keep you confused and pledged to their will. it’s a diabolical and violent ill, because they give us the snack crumble, while they keep the whole pie! AS if they could provide you a valid reason why? HERE IS ONE : WE ARE GIVEN THE CRUMBS: JUST ENOUGH TO INDICATE THAT SOMETHING WAS EATEN AND LEFT OVER ON OUR FACE. OR WHICHEVER PLACE. BUT THAT SOMETHING DOESN’T MEASURE TO EXACTLY HOW MUCH WE ACTUALLY ATE. you know how crumbs are left forgotten on your chin, when talking to a stranger and no friend? when ain’t nobody tell you, those CRUMBS were left at the corner of your mouth’s turn? those CRUMBS have spoken for a desire to LEARN. they were left elsewhere, found on your shirt. just like dirt, hidden in between all of your forgotten nooks and crannies, some of y’all : even got crumbs in your panties! yikes : the cross contamination & intersected damnation, at a location not too FAR from your teeth biting into this struggle BAR. quite soon it’ll melt & stain! wouldn’t that be a shame ? but it ain’t just you, we all belong to this CRUMB SOCIETY. handkerchiefs, napkins, and tissues, come to the rescue in remedy of this issue! whether jelly, spaghetti, or sugar confetti. or like a photo seen on GETTY! Why wait to be ready? to acknowledge and do something about these CRUMBS : in the suburbs or slums, we are the sums of intentional wage theft. but with ongoing Political Education and Organization, all of their CRUMBS will exit, stage left!
“Do you remember the twenty-first night of September? Love was changing the minds of pretenders… While chasing the clouds away…”
Do You R3m3mb3r?
YOU CAN’T REMEMBER WHEN IT’S HAPPENING! Seeing as now it’s the 22nd night of September, I’ve had some time to reflect on the changing pretenders Earth, Wind, And Fire was speaking about…
Chasing the clouds away for clout, what could that be all about?
When one follows the digital screen, they attempt to gather and collect what and where nuance may glean.
Shooting stars, and crashing cars.
milky way galaxy.
supernova you or me?
inspected by the bug!
refusing a nocturnal hug.
matched flames?
dissolute remains!
alabaster blast.
formidable cask.
underneath the mask.
Powder and dust.
Silver and gold rust.
by appearing real.
shadows feel.
by lurking light.
reflecting slightly bright.
bells rining.
soul singing!
(if you care to listen and jam out, Click the link below!)
Even if you were to listen 3 times, it still wouldn’t take you 7 minutes to listen!
i sat down on one of the loneliest benches in the city amidst the piss, perfume, and upscale degradation _ it is with no hesitation to witness : that, this is a city filled with pretty & superfluous dreams.
all of which are split at the seams because the luxury of such life : bears insufferable strife.
on every corner, folks gather and scatter to enter the markets, to meander and shop!
hoping that their cards and credit won’t flop!
the currency and change makes one deranged through the arrangements of who potentially may be able to try it.
or who is willingly able to buy it?
if the advertising scheme is to beam any light, it’ll glow constantly through the morning, evening and late @ night.
glistening programs intending to influence your thoughts and the framing around them.
the measure is neither bountiful or slim.
as it concerns who gets to feel the impact of this glitter…despite the pockets of litter found in between streets or the desperate cries for consumption via uber eats.
the packaging is more real than the supposed material gain.
the profits remain, only among those that exploit the collective masses.
to this bench, i testified of a memory belonging amongst the lowest of classes.
when having no shelter, clean apparel, or access to a prescription to refill my glasses…
i struggled to see : how social systems could justify this neglect while claiming freedom simultaneously?
abruptly: the loneliest bench in the city – spoke back to me (with these words) : “as cement is drilled into a hole, and wooden wedges are placed inside to fill the vacant sole – so shall the ruling class walk on by, sitting on top of skyscrapers – built up high, like pigeons: it is there that they spy : to maintain their hegemonic & cawing lullaby.
if you listen 3 times, it still won’t take 7 minutes of your time 🥳
By golly, The Svengali of it aLl, how many rubber bands, they putting on that BaLl?
How many steps are leading to that HaLl?
deception’s VaSe – seeking an uprooted FlOwEr in CaSe there’s pOwEr to TrAcE.
‘rEaDiNg’ is our brain’s ‘FeEdiNg’ to the ToP, it doesn’t sToP.
If you’re WiShInG maybe you should be DiShiNg all the candy, salad, and nuts allowed in cLoVeR,
<<<<<<<<<<just know it ain’t OvEr !<<<<<<<<<<
sometimes you gotta ‘set the rhyme of LaW’ which is merely, calling out every presumed fLaW: if you wanna TRY ME, i won’t 🐝 SIGHING OR WONDERING WHY ME? i’ll just give you a reason to SEE! I ain’t about that life, cuz’ while assumption may cry the eAsE, for the ‘WhEeZe’ of the uncommon 1nE, that sees it ALL as sin and ‘uNdOnE’
i AiM to FrAmE that ‘nAmE’ how about we : start at those OfFeNdEd … their minds are often AtTeNdEd (to secular CoNcErn, preferring to BuRn) in contempt of the NoTiOn, to that which they’re AgAiNsT, like a guarded and barbed wired FeNcE.… they rather cut and ShOcK, than recognizing their judgment acts like a defensible bLoCk.
so here’s to setting the rhyme of law! mustard GrEeNs$ for absurd MeAnS : in order for a cOnDiTiOn to meet the ReNdiTiOn of fruitful AmBiTiOn: we must at first be given pErMiSsOn.
(if you wanna get heated in sTyLe, here’s a read worth your wHiLe…)
ALUMINUM DRESSING TO KEEP THEM GUESSING)
micro fancy, but with expensive and expansive designation for flossy ApPaRrEl with attention to details, so sTeRiLe with loaded bullets down the BaRrEl. it’s about as ReAl*** as the word could mAkE it, as hot as the baker could bAkE it.
unable to be put in a microwave as the waves radiate and ExPoSe. thereby fluttering the one with the RoSe. if peddles could speak : would they cut among the WeAk?! Ha, sad thorns built on the oUtSiDe, as thunderstorms rolls over all the starry eYeD. wavering inflictions swoon my addictions to higher LaNdS. greater and stronger cOmMaNdS. thus, i’m flipping through the elementary and university sTaGeS – as the pAgEs turned has been suited only for livable WaGeS!
In episode five of : How To Sew A Button – We’re back to the 2 hole button! I did less talking in this one with instead captioned instructions. At the end of the video I also add a short poem alongside with transitionary phrases of outfits.
the pieces of me? they wish to know! but would they bother to figure it out?!
upon reasonable cynicism or dubious suspicion, my recognition_ of your stain remains!
wholly composed with a toxic ink – that is IF digested in sync. in a previous life, my spirit was kept to this bewildering strife.
daily mentions of your gleam. fire and steam pressing down your jeans. i could have made a diary out of the memories you seemed to redeem, justifying our ripped seams. my dream is never cast by a responders reach, but by a living testament resurrected to teach.
when lessons have turned into splendid confessions of the highest order /// obtained knowledge is gleaned, crossing between imposed boarders. this wisdom endows us with a movement to act!!!! (consider this a dialectical materialist fact!)
proven by the wisdom of my yearning eyes : this chosen potion is as such summarized :
“your taste kept me at pace with the grace of your X’d face.
a rhyme that is followed by a sweet stench – a supplication which has already been quenched.
as the milk on my lips belonged to : your deep refrain …
a song and dance which harmonized and sustained, tho through frustratingly knotted chains!
forgotten in my car: were loaded peanut butter pieces, undermined by the heat found in the creases…
*only remembered when i dropped my phone in between _ BuT WhAt CoUlD tHiS sYmbOlLiCaLlY MeAn?*
as the caramel candy, coated the edges of my sleeve, my outfit realization became ruined inside the exposed cleave.
perplexing chocolate subject to the law of impermanence.
communication should be easy but for a lot folks they’re wheezy to breezy ‘non-specifics.’ it becomes abstract to the point of distraction. all your numbers swallowed in subtraction. bleeding into a performance ‘extraction’. all of this, to say : you’re expected to do the work for other folks.
if you’ve ever been the one in the class who finished your work first, & expected spying eyes looking at your paper for the ‘answers’, you know very well just what party and what dancers make that scene. with a sly and glean jest, folks be making all the mess.
we should study and hold ourselves accountable as to not be caught slipping, like Jimmy! (YOO & shoutout to Slipping Jimmy, from ‘Better Call Saul‘ – a show I did not expect to connect with as much as eye have recently!)
One of the most enjoyable aspects of the show for me is the display of contradictions. ::: Lawyers // Grifters. DA Streets // Institutions. Ethical Justice By The State // Living On The Ends To Advance To The Top. ::: There’s a lot that can be said about all sorts of life’s thrills and ills. It’s natural to acknowledge the contradictions in all of life. Positives and negatives.
everything is connected // that is to say : related to each other. historically & materially – various lines intersect. conscious & subconscious beings do not exist within a vacuum. time itself is a continuation in and of itself. which is to say : what’s happened, is about to happen , and is already happening. it didn’t stop. nor did it pause, it extended. like a song recommended by additional bells and whistle’s. it’s steadily going because it’s relational.
It’s true, the jokes write themselves, like sinister elves seeking fairy shelves encoded with dust. one could perceive the reaction to lust, as a pie without crust ???
what is a conspiracy if not mass delusion by distracting the masses of the people on learning how systems operate and how everything is connected? whether you’re talking about aliens or lizard people – if that doesn’t involve material conditions which are controlled by forces such as (exploitation, violence by the state, status quo compliance by controlling women and marginalized genders and the like) if your conspiracy is too abstract to understand, it should be discarded or rather shaved to the point of making sense and getting through to the listener. if your ‘conspiracy’ can’t be explained in 10 seconds or less, than maybe it’s best – to say less? or at least study what can be proven by history / her story/ their-story / this being the most profound glory ! one has to wonder? if thoughts leading to silence will speak like thunder! if the wind ascends or if the sound is bound?
the guess of who knows? replied : i found out, what you about _ and it’s clinging to the clout. why chase, if all you’ll do is erase and out pace your need for examining grace. take space….lest your mistake the window for your face !
To This the proclamation was interrogated: Shall I Serenade or Fade?
whether you spend or trade it’s counting to something like a ‘thing’ that would sing
inquire : the ability to read the room! you mustn’t mop the floor, until you sweep before with a broom! gather all the pieces in a collected space. before you wet and spread dust mites and shaved lace all over the place! yooo! check out what’s going on! “sleeping until dawn” without an awareness of whose there, will lead you to nowhere! take a moment, pause. or claw like a timid cat with a cause. a reason in which your ‘season’ overstayed. your garrulous essay has quickly been outweighed. by your sentence, lexicon, story, & faction. any action is discouraged and swiftly put to rest, if you’re making a mess out of keeping one at bay to what you steadily say, which is an extended remix at best… i’m just saying … you might need to say less! but for you, that might be like taking a difficult test and to this : may I encourage that you study expeditiously, & like hot cup of tea, sip slowly and carefully for it’s truly a benefit in reading the room! cuz’ you mustn’t mop the floor until you sweep with the broom! gather all the pieces in a collected space! before you wet and spread dust mites and shaved lace all over the place! 🙄🧹🐭
In the 4th episode of ‘How To Sew A ButtoN’, I’ll teach you how to sew a 4 hole button (again) with this being a series, keep in mind….it’ll get more random as it continues. I can only imagine what awaits us 36 episodes down the line…on the 40th episode! we shall see! Until then, stay in tuned here on my website for new upcoming additions and reflections. Welcome to any new viewer who have been peeping out my webpage. I hope to connect with more folks in the real, via algorithmic persuasion! Blessings, y’all ! ❤
the most common button! the 4 (::) hole button, which usually goes down from top to bottom! ↔️ bottom to my top. this will be a SEVENTY SEVEN episode endeavor – featuring various ways of sewing. wrong ways, right days,a collection of variances and similarities.
this will be a SEVENTY SEVEN episode endeavor – featuring various ways of sewing. wrong ways, right days, a collection of variances and similarities. on the 7th episode – stay tuned ‘here’ for a special announcement !
i’ll teach you how to sew a 2 (:) hole button. it’s easier than it looks, blessings! this is how i like to do it, you may have another way! this is to no dismay, for sharing is caring ! blessings !
part 2!
this will be a SEVENTY SEVEN episode endeavor – featuring various ways of sewing. wrong ways, right days, a collection of variances and similarities. on the 7th episode – stay tuned to ‘here’ for a special announcement!
In the first episode of this series, I teach you how to sew a 1 (u) hole button.
this will be a SEVENTY SEVEN episode endeavor – featuring various ways of sewing. wrong ways, right days, a collection of variances and similarities. on the 7th episode – stay tuned to ‘here’ for a special announcement
This poem is a four message poem, listen with the intent to get through. you may need to listen /read it slowly. you may need to listen to it 3 times. it’s poetry but it does make sense if your rhyme is aligned, blessings!
shining brightly, electrifying me to the frame of your name. bursting from the seams : with explosive ultralight beams, you buzz me intoxicatingly, into your illuminations. charcoal stained stations overflow the crevices of my every location. passcodes bypassed. firewalls lambast. space and time. place and mind. who knows what can be, framed as Illuminati?
this is for the superstars forgotten near and afar : performing with microphones dripped in ice – costumes sparkling nice, right before the cocktail’s crow thrice. now already invalidated, the trash bags have been consolidated. saving up the space for more waste! helping them to share the light in front of the sleeping face. by lifting their weight and carrying their excess stone. when dreams seek for a familiar place to roam. as the bee parades the succulent nectar, so should we become the adjacent collector. storing what is gained, from the flower and the tree & then releasing it via truth to power {dialectically}.
right as you heard the BOOM – i aligned my chakras in tune with the new moon. hoping to be at the right place, just in time for lines to trace, me right back to the bass, that’s been plucked. a funk note so obtuse, it commanded your body on the 2 & 4 to get loose! there you went; wishing to be seen glistening like the sheer blue sky, clouds accenting the pallets, gloriously from on high. like water for chocolate but instead chocolate for oat milk. may your stream be smooth like silk. it is both from : the emergence of the wise and the not knowing; that the ever glowing, pages will assert themselves done, just as the sun rises with no refusal of anyone.
ticking by a designated appointment time. each second steadily & frantically reducing : energy’s most reusable prime. engaging negative and positive forces have now lit up the walls. while, coloring the ghetto stalls. like a historic landscape scribbled with graffiti in a gentrified neighborhood, or the house-less person whose intentions are immediately not seen as good. We are advised by the penciled post it note, flowing from the river with political education as our boat : chewing profusely so that indigenous land back knowledge is smoothly passed down our throat. this can appear as a pacifying tragedy of events, if the role in playwright, would pay in dollars but not in sense! interrupted by auditory shatters while the glass falls, it matters as it scatters like an unexpected capitalist exploitive bill torn to tatters. if you’re asking about the chatter, take another squeeze cuz’ it’s sho nuff a lil’ fatter!
when preparation met opportunity – the bee fluently : found it all to be amazing… AH : MAZE. a daze of circular buzzing thought. ranging from what you ought and what they sought, in the search of becoming more clear: the staging of such ‘arrivals’ means planning.
organizing. scheduling. ahead of time. ha, a head of time! one has to imagine, what this head is thinking and if it intends to be drinking? as the springs of capture can lead to the effervescent rapture. in the blink of an eye, all that was soon to be had became land, air, and sea. miseries and reveries all around me, up until buzzed in the ear which answered the call to not fear. ILLUMINATI BOOM BOMB BEE awakening me to remain clever, to stay forward : backwards never! throughout any endeavor!
= BEE BOMB BOOM ILLUMINATI – who knew that the 🐝 could 💣 causing a 💥 , allowing the space for explosive💡illumination?
If you care to listen to watch / hear about my experiences with vipsanna, you can watch that here. ❤
Enemy // Inner Me
is it the enemy or the inner me? the voice outside which chides my pride ! yet : the thunder and tide reside within my subconscious and it is there / where i spin. sensations breaking down as ‘sin stations’ locations wherein the wrong, is corrected by a meditative song uncontrolled by the thoughts which leave and awake many unresolved cookies going unbaked but what does that mean for the batter ? constantly flowing with chatter and fuss. a matter of the people or an individualized us?
this is of correspondence: appealing onto the skin but also the thing which rings within – by exposing slices of infinity we are then able to locate the vicinity of divinity.
and if my heart had hands ? they’re lifted! but if my eyes had arms? they’ve already sifted _ through all the jargon that liberal stems wish i’d pardon however i’m much too stained : with every fragrance of their name.
to every disdain, i refuse to remain in the boat rolling afloat, to the stream of capitalist and imperialist psychological warfare !
whichever our affair, we must still prepare forward with an objective – sure to win! this is to no end as both, the enemy and inner me – can be observed and become silently unnerved.
to the enemy or inner me : one must be equanimous observing so that we don’t react : for the universal act is ‘The Law of Impermanence’ everything is constantly changing (by rising and passing away) & with this sentiment remaining true, may we step forward by examining our vibrations casting away the old and new, holding onto only the present ‘you’.
writing until the pen runs N2 paradise clarity! (by uniform & random means) 