+EXT : (30) – ASSIGNED // ALIGNED

i have a reply but i’m unable to share it
i got a word but i’m thinking you’re unable to bear it!
that’s to say ; this word can climb trees :
this word will get you to confess on your knees !
like a fox searches for prey
I’m traveling by stealthy feet
hoping my capture will widen and greet
all of the variations of foods supply, are written true & tasty in my mind’s eye!

i dare not hide the notion that exceeds your ocean !!!
rocking and waving, for all the discs playing (in stereo) by the love we’re saving.
arriving at a point to say, SCREAM, & rElAy!
it’s to no dismay : even with a sad & hardened heart, the response of the shadows, honor light at the first start
even when the ‘aims’ do not fully chart…

🤔😕🧐😟😐🤨

popping tums
for my stomach ‘ummm’s’
pausing where the growls meet a pregnant wonder
so that my thoughts might strike like thunder
and the meaning to believe: reaches you : so
that you are rescued from drowning under

my heart is beating all at once
trying to discover why the race has slurred
my visions blurred
i wanna know
i’m trying
gas is expensive, so like the squirrel i’m flying
from the sacred antediluvian tree, to the smell of tropical fruits and smoked brie
as we walk on native indigenous lands,may our wills be set to struggle and UNDERSTAND!

i’m just remembering to write down what i’m assigned // aligned to do. dedication to the pen is a thrill oftentimes neglected. we don’t even give much time to everything we’ve done. while looking back at the things i’ve done, i still remain in jubilation at the many spaces made to continue advancing a better world.

whatever that looks like for my history. where the future resides. how i’ve come / coming / came to the terms of the spiritual world and the deep dividing of who is what & where meets there at the crossroads…

“until i find my answers, i’ll surround myself with dancers…
& i must go & i must go alone
you can’t call me on the telephone…”

it’s so many thoughts i have to get through. most of which i’ve only began to scratch. i am committed to redeeming these notions because it’s where i’m found. my heart is breathing steadily and it making me an outlier.

a present alien to foreign ground. it’s my awakening. the beast and flower passing into a truthful power. being strong in disagreeing. the seeing and the flowers of believing. i’ve done many things and now is a time for organizing of every material reality. so that i can see! i’m ready to jump in the 🔥FIRE🔥 and ignite the wire while being fit with a deserving attire.

Moon and Sun : resourceful and remorseful is the cry when requirements have been unreached. making a speech to the pupils who are soon capable to teach. yet, always remaining a student and in study of the rule, whereby change constantly occurs. uncovering this answer with jotted lines of smooth but rough stirs.

the pencil is a treasured friend. in it – I can erase with pace the mistakes that are to surely take place. + an ASMR luxury, with mechanical ease, the pencil also sharpens the ears with a delicate breeze. unlike the pen or permanent sharpie : one does not have to outdo the lines with scribble (though the dribble can be one of an honorable threaded typo) leading us into the fate of a pristine date!!! (ain’t that gr8?)

shoutout to the etc of embroidery threads

extension……to be acknowledged in the silence. a retreat festering deep. my soul seeking to be at a place of ‘SEEING THINGS AS THEY ARE’ weighing it all. transforming. honing into the knew me. harmonizing the conscious and unconscious.

EMBEDDED INDIGO

captions included 🙂

in bed, within the inn – i then go,
soft peddles of a perfumed floral ring
‘a rose’ in me : the call of a bee sting.
entwined in clusters of blue and carpenter’s wood
remains flames of extravagance, shouldering between transgression and what’s expected to be good
at the cocktail’s hour, happy itself – extends into the pour of a whisky sour!

within this writing – i’m inciting : levels of tiny pebbles !
stuck inside the shoe, solving this dilemma is merely paying attention to the clue!
the case of this face is myriad but fallen short of obscene …
when the sense became non – i become a breathless yawn.
quivering into the distant soft tissue, as my tears are signatures of issues.

ranging from emotional neglect and tortured trauma!
but confessions of repentance have been absolved through the teachings of the Dalai Lama! (((it should be noted : the dalai lama and 🧿 DO NOT IDEOLOGICALLY ALIGN, as They’ve worked with the 👀ℹ️🅰️, so….👎🏿 ! i only used their mention due to the rhyme provided on the spare dime in time.)))

i’m kept close by the face of an perplexing ace!
while going through this crisis of
energy – is not at all unexpected …

yet: it does appear suspected

as so much can be said…………..
instead
i’ll pause where my whispers swallow
the voice inside, is a guide to which i follow

the fiction of the white
just might: speak way too soon…..
months of turning pages to the crescent & whole moon

still
awaiting colors, glisten serene
and while the contradictions long to be seen….
dialectically & eclectically : to those that suggest otherwise,
by the sight of their reading eyes? lines indeed, align and surprise!

while : in bed, within the inn – i then know, embedded indigo!

I originally conceptualized the title “embedded indigo” after gathering all of my close friends at Benihana’s in Chanhassen Minnesota! I remember I worked at Mall of America at the time, and TrevorGuy called me around the time, I was leaving work. “Prince is having a music video dress rehearsal for Judith Hill with Eric Leeds, tonight at Paisley Park and you’re invited to bring in a couple of folks. Details forthcoming. Are you down?” “Absolutely, I’ll let my folks know!” I was absolutely ecstatic about going to Paisley Park and to add to that : A music video with two of my favorite musical artists!? I told the ‘True Blues’ (y’all know who you are!) AND we were all excited to be there!

For added context: I had only been to Minnesota 3 months at this point and things were already picking up, as only 2 days ago from this point I got 3 messages that a private party : was happening at Paisley Park and me and my friends had been invited to Paisley! If y’all want a run down of what happened you can watch that here! https://youtu.be/zSQWWAwRWgg

BACK TO BENIHANA’S! So we are all there awaiting what’s the scoop! everybody’s asking me, what’s about to happen!? Obviously I would know right? Well no. Prince never gave any information about what was about to happen, he just told you to prepare and that I did. It was at least 21 of us and none of us did not know what would happen. We were all sharing Prince stories and all guessing all what could go down. Clearly, we were all decked in our finest of clothes. I do remember having blue on at the time.

Suddenly : I get a call from TrevorGuy.

ALL eyes are suddenly on me as my ringer is on and I knew it was the call, we’d all be waiting for. I briskly brushed off into a quiet space, leaving them all in lingering anticipation.

I get back to the phone and hear :

“hey, sorry. Prince is not going to do it tonight. some things came up. sorry, will be in contact soon. peace.”

ALL I felt inside was blue. A deep blue. So deeply on me it felt like a deep url code. not just any kind of blue but a mood indigo like Duke Ellington spoke about. It wasn’t necessarily sadness though, just like someone dipped in a ocean of reflection. How was I going to tell everybody it wasn’t happening!? I remember thinking about dreading the walk of shame back to everyone awaiting what would be the next move.

Soon as i came back to the fold, my head shaking in every direction : everyone knew and we all laughed it off. in fact the rest of the night was spent with many other folks who had been to Paisley throughout the years when this was a common occurrence!

“Oh you mean, driving out in the middle of nowhere before there was ‘modern construction’ because you were told there was a paisley park party at -35 degrees and when he leaves you outside for like 3 hours and then decides at the last minute, nah.” Hahaha

Prince. His way about things were not linear. All throughout the night, I can’t say I was really feeling blue as in sad tho. I was very much energized throughout the laughter that ensued & with good eating though we were not a part of the experience. In many ways this is how I feel about Prince and the anniversaries of his ‘transcendence.’ Which is today. There is no real sadness only memories of joy when listening to the “flames of extravagance” that is Prince.

In many ways it all feels like a parallel vortex when this time comes around, a familiar whisper in the shadows. Whispering deeply, but a jovial memorial indigo.

2:TwOtOToO

it is
cuz’ it has been
and will be
just as it must return

like a boomerang burned
with dragon teeth fangs,
it’ll cut with fire
like an electrified barbed wire

slicing your attire
exposing your repentance of skin and flame…
in aim to frame, what exactly is that ‘AFRICAN’ name?

“I’m on my way back home!”

“really? without me, how did you get a ticket so fast?”

-___-

I mean I’m going back to the house!

Ha, ha,

I swore you were a mouse!

Except I caught them packaging the cheese, with a request for MORE PLEASE! a little like a tease, but with a swift breeze, I hereby grant you the keys :::

to return back to the zone whereby you are closer to home in spirit and mind.

don’t go blind to the sound, extend in reach of the palindrome : (remembering not just from the dome) but also the written word.

it needn’t be absurd!

2 two too to : is also on a two’sday!

“I am” : u.r.i.s.o.p.c (statement piece)

*this was a poetic piece I created for IGF (Irreducible Grace Foundation) in collaboration with Ms. Jane and Dr. D : they both helped me to reach into that place within me – to convey sincerity and honesty through the power of breathing amidst the search of discovering who I am… this is the poetic piece I wrote out describing who I am. it has typically been difficult for me to name specifics of who I am but now, I am more assured in the discovery of ‘what’s in a name’ that I have no reason to be ashamed. blessings y’all! ❤ *

i am : Arican. who like most of us, were raised on colonized and stolen lands. (If not in location, in mind bands )

i come from : radical and religious sentiments! an environment which reinforced to me that my questions : were far too deep! that my interrogations of life’s contradictions were far too steep! The church, the Bible, and the Holy Ghost was our daily bread and butter, because if not in the name of Jesus – every other voice? could stutter!

when you look at me : you see – brown skin, large buttons, and thick locks of hair – they’re not dreadlocks, that would imply they’re dreadful and they’re not. you will also see, your own confirmation biases, but ULTIMATELY what you see are scattered remnants of survival.

When I look in the mirror : I see a man attempting to advance a better world through struggle and the sharing of joy through creation and revolutionary politics. I see a window at odds with dialectical history // worlds interlocked unfolding, the deeper and reachable mystery.

Uniformy & RaNdOmLy : in Search of Paradise Clarity!

What you don’t see is : a man seeking to heal trauma that has flustered me. My ‘First & longest relationship was with someone who used the language of love but never matched practice with theory. I was 18, freshly graduated from high school : ready to move to another country to escape the command & rule.

I get stressed out : when I neglect to see what has been proven to be within me. when in stress, my will is often a mess out at every express, I soon begin to digress. All of these things and more can be the case, which is why instead i take a pause ______ and breathe, to make space.

I take care of myself by: breathing within and remembering the various tools i have for access. Just as sewing and writing pens are tools of connection : so is breathing. i like to breathe using the 4 for 4 method.

Take 4 seconds to INHALE (through your nose)
HOLD your inhale at the top for 4 seconds
Take 4 seconds to EXHALE (through your mouth)

*4 counts in between each breathe !*

when you take deep breath it activates the vagus nerve – sending a message to yo brain that you are calm..

we win when we breathe from within. There is no end, only the will to perpetually transcend! whether your at 0 or 10 – i recommend, you find that space and begin.

::: “i say this to you, so that you know that : ACCESS is from within, when placed in an uneasy or stressful situation, remember that you have the tools and can get to that place of healing and rest.”

i often use this tool when i am stressed about something i can’t easily each or obtain. this technique is often used in combat – to calm the fighter before and after a situation. May you find it useful in any stressful situation!

EvErYwHeRe n’ EvErYtHiNg

this writing has scheduled me captive
a release of this feeling, caging me adaptive :
to all of the colors of misery left to display.
(you can expect nursery rhymes, idioms, and fantasy – hooray!)
these tones and fixtures dressing my shadows are compromised by a flaunting spark.
it flickers like a flame
but the accountancy checks, marks?
are signed by a fraudulent name!
to what end does this despair carry?
unspoken abbreviations which can no longer tarry…
the marriage of the dichotomy between liquid and gas
prompts offspring of the physical and spiritual heir to come to past.

everywhere, n’ everything started to sing
people, places, n’ ideas, signaled a RING!
a chance to be answered by sweaty and out of breath dancers – fancying the occasion, to respond to this decadent persuasion. in which all NOUNS had to recite their lines, up beat, crushed, & entwined !

but,
instead of facing the consequences truly,
their cowardice became unruly.
outside of the inside and around the down and found – traveling at a speed where their nebula can reach before the flashlight could click.
right before, my feet met slick
like an x – rated flick
now there’s a drip
providing a spiral confession :
wherein this tale reads as my succession
everybody readily ‘revels’ at the bounce.
a party filled with jello and colorful hellos.
it would be seen as circumstantial- to not undress and dismantle.
so here’s to the cutting – right to the chase – windows perplexed and mirrors gone to waste.
a price of vanity, is an impending transaction.
these muscular trophies, have been attained through repetitive tension.
filled with cyclical-calendar-commitments-reimbursing-the-worked out-pension.
here are a few, (commitments) which make due :
turtles n’ gloves.
rubrics n; doves.
magic and mind.
candy at influx with rhyme.
calories and added fat. mistakes and cute cats. soothing the reminder of yesteryear, reminding very clear as to what it means to be free.
a collective university,
wherein the masses accompany
– in struggle and in harmony!

for..

many are displaced.
figuring out what caused their mind to go ace. stricken from the eyes – passionate lullabies.
tread with light feet.
colorful slides? mesmerized!
roasted junctions in heat as the sun turns to direction of the west
a light recurs to test!
a bedazzling agent provocateur,
inviting lace scented webs stringed to allure.

shall i continue or go on?
back when, n’ again…

everywhere, n’ everything started to sing
people, places, n’ ideas, signaled a THING!

singing tunes of the clown and a smile that became a frown!
not all answers went down.
some went around.
others came to only fly.
i could try.
but i can’t explain the withering refrain

for..

the pedigree of my registry
left me aligned with a succulent pleasantry
i’m hungry cuz my motions have been left starved
as structures became carved
medicine was then pulverized
to escape the large n’ embodied surprise
cuz that pill? was built ill!

everywhere, n’ everything started to sing
people, places, n’ ideas, signaled a RING!