Deception – writing until the pen runs N2 paradise clarity! (by uniform & random means)

Pursuit // Pleasure

*The following script, is in connection to a series of conversations entitled ‘Riddle Me That…” which is due for release at the beginning of 2019.

Palmar: Hey, have you tried the new app Fructose that allows you to explore the depths of glucose?

Allegra: Ah! Yes! It’s so good. Every time I think I should put it down – it proves me to be a liar because I can’t let it go. It’s like that chip you keep coming back too and the lemonade your grandmother makes! It’s just addictive like crack, honestly! lol!

Palmar: That’s what I heard and probably precisely why I ain’t trying to give it a go. I don’t want to do anything that makes me a slave to it.

Allegra: Who claimed you’d be a slave to it?

Palmar: Well, you mentioned crack and grandma’s lemonade…I’d say it’s quite powerful. Powerful enough to be the master of your senses. If it makes you a liar that means you can’t contest it.

Allegra: I never tried to contest it because I enjoy indulging it so much.

Palmar: Have you tried to abstain from it to see how your body would react to it?

Allegra: I ain’t trying to break away from it because I worry I might be dependent on it and you know the body develops dependence to some substances. If an alcoholic goes cold turkey it could literally kill them because they abused it for so long.

Palmar: So, would you say you abuse fructose?

Allegra: I suppose, I do. But we all abuse various things in life – I don’t think it’s a big deal.

Palmar: If you don’t want to live long and develop various diseases – you do have a point.

Allegra: Yeah but I don’t see why you are making it seem as if pursuing pleasure is a bad thing, we all have our various vices.

Palmar: You know what they say: Everything in moderation. If you feel you can’t resist fructose you might to want to start cutting it out one day at a time. Cold turkey might not be the best alternative but slowly breaking away from your addiction secures a better future for your mental and physical health.

Allegra: But I like fructose, why break away from what I like?

Palmar: Not all vices are remedies to the consequences that come from them.

Allegra: Ok. Well, I’m going to do me, and you can do you.

Palmar: So, are you saying you rather continue to head down a cycle of abuse because this is YOU right now?

Allegra: All I said is I’ll do me, and you will do you. I never asked you to lecture me about the dangers of fructose. I am aware of how bad it could be. However, as with anything they’re loopholes.

Palmar: I reckon those loopholes are very few.

Allegra: So, are you going to interrogate me about this from this day forth? Are you going to continually remind me how I’m killing myself and recommend me articles and links to help me get better or what? Do you think most obese and overweight people know they are or should they be constantly reminded of this fact?

Palmar: Healthy reminders shouldn’t be triggers.

Allegra: But they shouldn’t reinforce a sense of evangelism either. You can say what you need without judging me for it or educating me on something that I already know about. Some of us are on our way dying and can’t be convinced to change their habits. (Maybe they want to die or don’t care much for changing) No need to put me through an intervention. If I was on my death bed and I wanted to try LSD would you refuse me of that? Would you tell someone who is already dying that they should take proper steps to ensure they live longer? For what purpose? I don’t have children or a partner depending on my life.

Palmar: So, if you had children or a partner – that wouldn’t compel you to live longer?

Allegra: I’m not totally sure. That’s not why I do what I do. I have plenty of friends including yourself that may want the best for me. I just want you to know I understand the risks and if experience leads me to make a remarkable change then I’ll oblige but for now, I’ll enjoy my fructose but take more consideration to moderation.

Palmar: That’s good, I’m happy to hear that.

Allegra: I hope you live long and stay clear from the range of accidents! You know you never know when they may happen. *chuckles*

Sonic Blister(s)

To believe what is actual, not being deceived by how it appears. Sure, our frames of perception can be colorful and wide; but if we are gonna make a factual statement about another subject….It’s best to be sure to check the mathematics of your analysis.

Look Twice, Homie!

In the best of passion, we are often arrested in our own thrills. Caught in the rapture of our meaning and forgetful to the other side of the pole. This happens to the best of us. Our voice and more (visibly) our words are devices of construction. We are building a universe by the words we speak and by the intent we set. When having a conversation fueled with passion and dedication, remember to share the ball. If not, conversation becomes a sport and we begin to rectify Shakespeare’s Monologues. Caught up in our own whirlwinds of speech, cutting aimlessly in the air, making all of the scores.

“Speak the speech, I pray you, as I pronounced it to you, trippingly on the tongue: but if you mouth it, as many of your players do, I had as lief thetown-crier spoke my lines. Nor do not saw the air
too much with your hand, thus, but use all gently;
for in the very torrent, tempest, and, as I may say,
the whirlwind of passion, you must acquire and begeta temperance that may give it smoothness. O, it offends me to the soul to hear a robustious
periwig-pated fellow tear a passion to tatters, to
very rags, to split the ears of the groundlings, who for the most part are capable of nothing but
inexplicable dumbshows and noise: I would have sucha fellow whipped for o’erdoing Termagant; it
out-herods Herod: pray you, avoid it.”
– Hamlet: Act 3, Scene 2

I remember having to remember that monologue in theater class, and it’s always stayed with me. 😀

I could only imagine those on stage back then, would sometimes get caught up in the drama of the moment. Going way too far into their passions, and using their hands and body with too much weight and detail. Which Shakespear was not too fond of. He understood the need of temperance, which would allow a sort of smoothness. He wanted to avoid at all cost, the act of ‘Trying Too Hard’.

Maybe Shakespeare knew, people could see right through the act, and it was determined to sway through the disappointment of overdoing it.

This sets a remarkable parallel to the act of exercising on our madness. We can be thrown into our own passions at quite the cost, and this gives way to Sonic Blisters.

What are Sonic Blisters?

Sound trapped in some kind of emotional cut, and when we feel the cut, we scream. We act on the drama that we experience and are honest to whatever the feeling brings forth. If it’s frustration, it’s frustration. If it’s kindness, it’s kindness. Sometimes we can bleed too far into the outrage and it becomes overwhelmingly too much – but these blisters are controlled through sound.

Looking Twice // Listening Closely.

Sex Shuffle

Shuffling between the cards laid about between my deck, many strangers of games – gaze in my incentive.

Aliens are these strangers with a unique knowledge that seems familiar.

They speak of this muse and how long she sought to travel down the line and within a consciousness of root.

She begged me to go deeper.

She closed my eyes with the whispers of her satisfaction

Then I woke up in the dream of her own existence.

Who was I really looking at anyway?

My vibrations begin to deceive the bed where I lied.

The question is: Do You Lie?

If you’re talking about if I sleep or not, yes I do.

I lie.

But it is not a lie of deception.

The more I try to explain, I then, I lose half of the reasons she came to me.

It happens so fast, I squeezed her frame and she reminded me she was only that a frame.

Many selections are now in play and they gather with a sequence of sex.

Sex which shuffles the cards of game or reality?

Accidental Racists (Languid Depravity)

This ‘America’ WE have come to accept; IS created PRIMARILY by immigrant culture. BE it, the English, who fled the KING, the Chinese who built the railroads, the Africans who created the White House, and created the first almanac, or Latin America who has landscaped and constructed our buildings. Besides; not even acknowledging, the genocide of the masses of indigenous people. To imply America is a ‘WHITE NATION’ implies, those white people, single handily BUILT this nation, and that, the same laws, which primarily benefited Whites in the past, still apply. NONSENSE, if people defend this theory, it throbs racism! We should NEVER FORGET THE PAST BUT NEVER DWELL ON IT EITHER. SO ALL, I am ranting on to say is that WE HAVE ALL DONE SOMETHING to make this ‘America’ of ours.

I speak on this as well, as this situation is very languid.

Languid Depravity

While my mind sprinkles desire; it begs for the oceans to silently roam its four corners.

While pleading its sincerity; it is soon given a sinister response.

The health of my consciousness is driven by images of honest realities.

As they present themselves to me; I hear the wonder of fulfillment as it meets the eyes of ability.

While looking at the framework of how life is positioned; a glimpse at my own value is considered.

How depraved I really am; if not by the renewal of study I am given to.

Once the seeds are planted; their propensity to grow is built on the unification of all the elements working to complete a yielding and accomplishment.

But are we to assume once the variable is reached; that its focus will deteriorate due to its handicapped nature?

Or are we the ones losing our identity because our building will be far more complicated than usual?

The depravity of our hearts has manifested on the approach of predetermined research given an answer to such dilemmas.

Seeking to undermine the potential and the resolute pronunciations of skill by the guesses of our injected theories.

How many accidents, does it take for it to appear as intentional?

Death Within A Mad Program

I Wish I was able to attend my FAVORITE Aunt in the world, Aunt Linda`s funeral today in Mississippi, but could not leave work. She not only taught me about the miracles in the universe. But how we are all equal! Whether you are a woman or man // You are capable of the same things! She was one of the first people to go against tradition. To bend the rules and enjoy life. To not be so focused on pleasing people but serving people!

She is one of the greatest inspirations in my life. Knowing I can`t talk to her for hours at a time really hurts me. I know God arranged her in my life for a purpose and that will be fulfilled day by day. She will continue to encourage me, cause as she always said and I never quite understood it until now. “All is well, even when you are not feeling good things are well”. It`s going to be hard not hearing her laugh and crack jokes about any and everything.

But her voice and her spirit are well with me!

I have been delayed in writing, but I am learning to allow my fingers to walk on the blank sheets of space. I have experienced betrayal, greed, selfishness, and disrespect on many levels of existence. I really am given the expense of surprise as I ponder the reasoning behind the heart of the peculiar minds. I really don’t know where I would be if it was not for the hand and heart from Miss X. She really has been there to listen and remind me that love yields understanding. I just want to be there with her, away from the madness I am within.

It’s amazing to hold on to the one that loves you and wants you to be saved from those against you. This is a hard time for me. So much madness, and delay all for the sake of MONEY.

Michael said it best:
“So you call it trust
But I say it’s just
In the devil’s game

Of greed and lust
They don’t care
They’d do me for the money
They don’t care
They use me for the money
So you go to church
Read the Holy word
In the scheme of life
It’s all absurd
They don’t care
They’d kill for the money
Do or dare
The thrill for the money”

The thrill of getting what is not rightfully owed to you NOW or even later, will not repair a broken relationship. The core of everything and anything is ‘Relationship’! How can anything function if the variables are not allowed the program of authenticity? Being loaned the hands of a quick fix can not puncture a digit that will respond to pressure. The height of invaluable measures is being dawned in a time of deception and selfish motive. When one cancels the logic that nature is derived from, the mono cause of its life becomes drowned in poisoned fluids. If not for the alive veins of study and codes, we are given the software bypassed by endless paradigms. The absurdity of blood thickens as the result is caused by the cut of a familiar knife.

I am held by the given love of Miss X; she is not a variable, but my tower and love. I really have to shout out my love for her, and the inspiration to keep on writing as that will develop an attitude and wonder to this madness…I love You!

Summarized Notion For Thought: I’ve used madness to conjure inspiration. The wonder of polluted intentions is understood when the visual for clarity is sound.