Eating – writing until the pen runs N2 paradise clarity! (by uniform & random means)

seeking…(Like A Lake)

the things i wished to do, i no longer care for
the places i wanted to travel, i can’t see as reasonable any more
is it because the covid numbers are spiking up?
or the doors which refuse me by slamming shut?

i wanna cry but don’t know why
i’m blanked in space
trying to rectify my face
i’m feeling numb, sad, and displaced
feeling alone in a ‘home’ that does not belong to me
wishing to paint with lens carefully and responsibly

while, cutting off those thrills which made it easy on my heart
i rather now be torn apart
by the very thing that’s eating me inside
it’s unnamed, unable to be framed, and thrives by the constant rain
that is to say : my crying tears are attempting to unmask my fears

although: stuck in a rut of staggering associations
befuddled by contradictory operations
seeking for a friend, but instead suddenly briefed by an online stranger that this too will soon end

without a sight to see what’s really wrong
or a voice to sing in harmonic song
having the very least, while the beast inside still demands a feast!
consuming everything at the dinner table
so that the unbelievable can be told as a fable

“did you see them eating all that cake? filling their stomach like algae would a lake! they probably wouldn’t feel that way – if they were the ones who had to make, all of which would soon be left to take!”

but: it’s a lot different when you’re behind an emotional wheel seeking to safely heal
& when the transportation to feel is left to squeal

if grief had a thief, would it take like a lake? or would it restore in its proper place : salty to fresh waters which trace back to grace?

How To Unlock Caterpillar Logic

Growing up in New Orleans for me was a privilege, that I don’t take for granted in my childhood. It meant good food, lively music, snowballs, and a rich culture. It also meant around spring time caterpillars would hang from my grandparents oak trees!

I dreaded caterpillars because they were very thick and sticky. There was often a host of caterpillars all crammed together like a pack of sardines. April and May, in particular, meant caterpillars would be everywhere from the sidewalks, bushes, and my grandmother’s porch. This did not mean much to my grandfather when he’d want assistance in cleaning the sidewalk.

“Come on out here boy, this sidewalk won’t brush itself!!” He’d yell.

“But he’s hysterical of those caterpillars!” Gammie would plead!

I’m thankful my Gammie always had my back and considered how I felt! It is through her care and concern, I never had to help my pops clean around outside during the spring! Luckily, I had a brother who didn’t mind as much! 😀

I never shook my fear of them until I left New Orleans. I didn’t see them at all in Texas although I noticed on occasion, I’d catch small moths and butterflies. I’ve grown to appreciate the caterpillar because of its developmental changes. I reference their process often in my life. Looking back at how afraid I was, I now see a misguided fear. Was I afraid of growing? Could I soon break free from the cocoon? The more I learned about their process, the more I appreciated their relevance in all living existence.

I made a short video breaking down an allegorical connection between caterpillars and the flow of your ideas!

Morning Breath

It’s not easy finding out what to do next, it’s scary because next could mean losing what you love or even fought for. However, leaps of faith are necessary for growth.

Sometimes, you have to grow without the comfort of the familiar. If you’re only on the cusp of what’s been given to you – how do you know what can be obtained? What can be dreamed of? What can be seen for what it is?

The future is all that imagination is capable of creating. We don’t always know presently how the future works but our goals provide the map to those various destinations. There is often a gap to the places that are near and far away. Which is why setting a goal at least creates a bridge to get there.

While on the way to your destination, life offers you various moments to learn something. Some people think you’re fucked when you don’t know, however, it’s when you learn about life when you realize how fucked you are.

The mind can enter early crises of thought when you think of what you eat, drink, think, wear, feel, know, don’t know, etc.

But be encouraged cuz knowledge is power and actually protects you from the dangers of not knowing. There’s so much to know and yet so much to discover. When you open your ears to all that’s available – you’ll constantly thirst for more.

There is no shortage of what you can learn in the universe. Just the idea of the universe itself expands so much interest for me. I never get tired of learning from the stars and galaxies around me. I still don’t seem to know shit about it in detail – cuz it’s so vast and ever expanding but still, it’s still so near.

I’m an astronaut in space, tethered to observation and a think tank.

We can get so caught up in what’s happening we often don’t consider just how close we are to being bitten.

Around the corner is what’s next and what’s next may have sharper teeth and to be bitten by the venom ain’t such a bad thing. You might get paralyzed by the bite. Unfortunately, Tragedy may lead to clarity – but everything is looking up! *When you low to the ground.*

When I think about how something ‘Happened’ I always have a better way of how I could have gone around it AFTER. Hindsight renews our ability to frame what we didn’t see before. I use to spend so much time – thinking how I could have said this or said that.

It seems now, the best option for me mostly is to be quiet, that way I can’t be accused of saying something when I didn’t say nothing at all. You have to pay for saying nothing tho cuz then people will think you weren’t listening. 😀

I think a reason why things happen like this is something that no one can avoid, no matter how hard they try and that’s Morning Breath. No matter how much you brush your teeth the night before. Even if you set an alarm in the middle of the night to brush – if you go back to sleep. There it is waiting for you.

When you wake up and make that first statement – if you’re too close to someone else, they’ll recognize the inescapable. Morning Breath comes without apology. You have to brush your teeth before you open your mouth to speak. You may also find someone who will tolerate your Morning Breath (for a period of time) until they even remind you about Brushing Your Teeth.

We are all alike in this way. Everyone has Morning Breath and everyone can do something before we allow others to deal with it. We can all be silent but eventually, we’re gonna wanna say something. Just make sure before you speak – you’re prepared with a proper wash. It’ll help prepare you for what happens next – no matter how hard the teeth may bite.

(shoutout to my friend Mark, from Louisiana : for his usage of ‘Next’ and the following sharp teeth that comes afterwards!)

The Dial of Your Philosophy

I rather the page of the story be bookmarked than turned completely. I’m drifting lost. No more pages left to read. A story told by the word of mouth. The art of listening is also hearing what was not being said. To be caught against offense is to not hold merit personally.

For theories and the word of the philosophers – the tongue is to encourage thinking and questioning. If you can not ask within yourself – the wonder remains lost. The answer is far found by systems designed that you function within them. If by departing into identity, you’ll be at an advantage to learn about liberty. The liberation of the soul is real and true.

We have teachers all around us imparting knowledge that we can learn and share from. Everyone wants to assume they are right and have the answers. Some offer better reasons than others. Standing on the fence of what’s right and what’s wrong – cross parallels the difference between the points and lines.

At what length does one go through to show where they stand? Proximity and measures across the boards – determine what is heard. Some ideas are sworn into a moral code and are eventually locked in. When these ideas become locked in, you risk the danger of cutting out new information. Ideas expand from root and observations – these are unknown causes that can only be set to challenge real effects.

I think a lot of us deal with way more than we have to. We put on extra because the world shares extra. A lot of what we know is partial. Subjectivity and objectivity are often confused.

“If I could speak only when spoken to – would you listen when asked? By listening – I mean to get where one is coming from without interjecting?

Every day I’m learning what it means to speak to myself in my mind. Before I open my mouth, I deal with what my brain processes beforehand. If I speak too soon, I may trespass a meaning that wasn’t intended. Nobody wants that. Then you have to suffer a repetition of what was said – to make sure you heard correctly. You might then have to deal with the delivery of how you said it.

We should all deal with our meanings, reactions, and emotions accordingly. More often than not, we may bite too soon and chew way too fast. How can anything we consume be properly digested if we’ve forced ourselves to eat at a fast pace?

Everybody seems to be in a hurry. The race to the finish line. If we could all be punctual – but we all have or different reasons for arriving late or even early. Some people don’t wear a watch and have to constantly ask – what time is it?

I wear a watch and this gives some a slither of confidence. I’m aware of the passing seconds. This sometimes wrestles with my anxiety when I think the time is running out. If anything time reinforces an amount of control we have temporarily – time is the only element we can agree on within a frame or more.

Belief is what you want or do not desire. You can turn it off or on. There isn’t really a way to look at it unless you start really believing it. Belief is really magic. The reason why people believe is beyond our comprehension. People usually have several different moral beliefs but fail at holding them in true value. This is because when challenged on what we believe it depends on the moment of our conviction.

You might catch me on a day where I’m trading my movement for stillness. My days are fractured by the measured on how well I kept up with emotion. The feelings we have are temporal and don’t really engage any long term values. When one appears they can easily hide behind the veil. Curtains are drawn. Masks are worn. Walls are shredded. It’s the bliss of spells cast by illusion and attention. There’s the art to morality that eventually calls into question philosophy. Where do you stand as it concerns YOUR PLACE IN THIS YOUNIVERSE?

You dial what moves are made by the orbit of gravity and shit. 😀

End Over Indulgence

This very series is symbolic – it’s not just about food. We often consume various things due to it simply being available to us. We weren’t always eating what we eat now but through habit and advertisement – sugars go through our brains which in return creates a reaction of dopamine. It’s a rush.

BUT

I’m eating better because I’m denying the invitation to eat more. (Portion Cutz)

This is the end of the series ‘A New Narrative of Consumption’. Sometimes you can eat too much but there comes a time you must consider what you are eating. Snacks ain’t bad and neither is food but sometimes you got to draw the line when you indulge at a very fast rate. The roar feeling inside our stomach – is demanding that you stop eating but it’s so good! But you got to tame the beast inside – &ENDOVERINDULGENCE

Perplexing Chocolate

Another narration of consumption! This week: Chocolate! When the chocolate is sitting on the table, you’ve been invited to eat! However, being perplexed at the very least shows attention to what can be gained. The only thing to loose would be – well, pounds. 😉

Portion Cutz

FOOD! GRUB! SNACKS!

The more I eat, the more I come to terms with just my eating habits. Eating like drinking water is necessary for survival. Both eating and drinking water can often be modified to the point of the question? How much are you eating? AND just what exactly are you eating? What are you drinking? How much are you drinking?

It’s amazing what the body is able to withstand. When you really think about the foods that are made available and how much we consume, it’s kind of mind-boggling. Especially here in the Western world. We eat so much sugar and have more oils and fats than we actually need. It certainly comes with its consequences. Everything gets stored somewhere, and then a Reduction takes place. Eating the wrong types of food, and eating too much of the wrong thing, alerts your body in some way.

Either, your energy dims out or you feel like you are about to explode. Those are not the most natural ways to feel after eating. Quite the opposite. Food, should restore and build up your cycles and refresh your systems do not send panics down your spine.

Food is one of my main sources of inspiration. Because of my love and admiration for food, my BODY has had an awful lot to say about what I’ve been putting inside of it. It’s one thing to love food, it’s a whole other thing, to love it to the point of eating more than you should.

Eyes can be deceiving. I can overall enjoy a good meal, but then I am subjected to the grunts of slumber and fatigue.

^^ Now, Sometimes Food Craves are like lurking and LOUD monsters. They beckon you, and they won’t leave until you acknowledge them. SO I went to Raisin Canes’ and enjoyed every bit of it.

(Here is where 7 & 7 come in….)

My eyes are sharpening to desire green. Whole, plant-based foods that contain as many nutrients as possible. So, I’m focusing on the WHOLE package. So many wonderful food options to explore, and with great seasonings! Food ain’t nothing without the seasonings!!

When hungry, it’s easy to cut through the meal in quick consumption. Yet, chewing food is one most forgotten experiences of euphoria. Taking time to chew each bite. I’m understanding that more. Not rushing into it, but thinking about the food as it goes down. Same goes for WATER. Treating it as a gift, and a chance to come closer to understanding. Hence, The Velvet Dinner.

I’m not going to be one of those people to say, I WILL NEVER EAT RED MEAT AGAIN! That’s like saying, Burger King is designed to destroy me. NEVER! Every now and then. Dark & Light. It’s OK to have one every now and again because as I said earlier our bodies have a great way of recovering. I’m not going to make affirmative statements like NEVER SHALL I EVER. But I’m not going to keep repeating the same mistakes, I’ve made with food.

Common Mistakes Include But Not Limited To: Ordering a Large instead of a Small, thinking I need to eat when I really need to drink more water, eating only once a day – cause CHIPOTLE!!! (OK, the last one is worth repeating at least once a week.

I’ve listened enough to know, significant consumption changes must take place for me. I’m aligning with that reality while moving forward with the guaranteed expectation of a health-conscious lifestyle paired with vigorous work ethic. The more I continue, my body will adjust and I don’t feel I need to rely on those foods, I’m used to eating. I can conqueror and align with the true harmony of focus and determination.

New World Water AND The Media Given Pill

I applied for 7 jobs today and I am literally exhausted.

I am about to work out very soon to keep my progress for Fitness in full rotation!

As I applied, I noticed just about every one of them with the exception of about two asked for unnecessary information.

This information is unnecessary because it would not affect my work ethic. COLOR, GENDER, ORIENTATION, AND DISABILITY should not mean anything to anyone. These are things the system wants to divide and conquer. Since when did statistics mean something? Sure they help us measure the development of a variable, but they do should not conquer individuals. Variables and change are not the same things, and we all have our unique pattern unlike anyone else.

What’s really the point of identifying color and Race. We are all one people, so giving the descriptions of what I am means nothing. Some people have already colored our own color by adding descriptions and laws based on what they perceived us to be.

But this is the same avenue that elects cartoon characters as politicians. So I guess I’m not that surprised. (That’s a new topic right there!)

So many of us are asleep because we have been drinking New World Water and a Media given Pill. I like to think of this pill as a blinding illusion that keeps one entertained. It promises us of the feast of satisfaction given by the Celebrity and Technological life. We see the fame, glory, measure, and talent as our minds crave it. I’ve realized it in my own veins, I had some time thinking about the overwhelming struggle and information that has been held hostage in our society due to the development of how we socialize.

Think for a moment will you of the information given to you FREELY at your exposure. Your fingers only need to dance on the keyboard for a few seconds to entertain some of this information. On the other hand, you don’t have to move at all. Corporations have set up businesses that feed us without having to move. We are being fed by the spoon of the media, and it’s more like a service to ourselves. They feed us wealth, of information and tools of how we can talk to one another. But, why talk…when you forget about walking? Walking keeps us in motion and keeps our bodies energized. It keeps us in the focused pivot of strategies. We don’t even need to imagine a world where robots take over, we are already living in that world. Our mindsets have somewhat become robotic, and we are all seemingly; walking around with a tormented allegiance to a system of programs.

The instruments that could be used to socialize our ideas of value, justice, grace, and honesty, have been traded for the pleasures of our temporal lusts motivated by our ‘friends’. (ADS PEOPLE?) Values seem to only come up with some calamity or worldwide adversity. Then people want to call on a ‘Love’ and concern. But, What matters is an awakening to love…Now! To the whole world. Fashion means a great deal, but it means even greater when we know why we wear what we wear. Why we put on the morning of our dreams and set our heads on the footstool of our visions…

It’s time to wake Up..if anything should be colorized; it is a revolution! Colors of value and a source of transcendence gives us more than enough animation. So even as I went on a deeply invested rant here..^^

Stop letting someone else feed you all the time. Feed yourself AND MOVE!

Summarized Notion For Thought: Please, stop deepening on that pill that keeps you asleep. It’s only doing more to make you lazy and obese. Nothing is wrong with having muscle but the muscle could help a nation if we can build stones together. If we can use what we have for someone else and lend our passions to the addition of real lives.