The Encounter (of The Bullet)

You can not always dodge the bullet meant for you. Some people come to the party already locked and loaded. By preparing yourself for any possible encounter with danger you still risk the encounter of a wildcard. To be shot is to be healed by the medication of bandages and possible surgical procedure. *Unless shot in the head or if the bullet punctured a vital point.* We can’t always miss the bullet especially if there’s one designed for you. If a sniper is out chilling on a skyscraper somewhere, they have you in target and nothing can fully protect you from it.

It’s a safe comfort to know, at most times this isn’t the case. If you’re free from pissing off the wrong people, there’s no bullet with your name on it. At least not an actual bullet, but if we’re talking about a metaphorical bullet dressed as a threat?

Those you won’t be able to protect yourself from. Nowadays people go through extreme measures to shame and silence if you come with criticism. We can see how this clearly happened with Nicki Minaj in her recent interview where she implied women should not “sell sex” and to know their worth. This sparked various comments from people challenging the root of her statements to get an objective point of view.

However, Nicki actually responded to someone on Twitter personally by not only attacking him but encouraging her ‘barbs’ to follow suit to teach him a lesson. This resulted in thousands of death threats, revealing his personal phone numbers and address, and personal attacks on his Twitter page. Nicki Minaj has millions of followers and he has only over 240k. This is an example of abused power at the expense to publicly embarrass you because of a disagreement.

The internet has become a place where we consistently release our disagreements and even go as far as talking against someone the moment they disagree. Threat culture seeks to dimish and silence those that simply steer in another direction. If you express an opinion of someone who’s favorable their army so to speak can come at you unawares. I experienced this recently with another popular psychologist who has gotten a fair amount of attention – Jordan Peterson.

It started out as a simple debate he had with Fry, Dyson, and Goldberg about Political Correctness. I watched a small portion of their debate and in this clip, I happen to agree with Dyson a bit more than Peterson. (I eventually watched the whole debate and I happen to validate all of the points they offered) I expressed my reasons for this and expressed them but people *by the hundreds* came to tell me how wrong my views were.

Luckily, I don’t have a large platform as of yet and I have not gained nearly as much attention as some people have but if I did – I wouldn’t see the end of it. This is the case for anyone online especially now who may encounter a mob just by simply expressing a difference of thought.

The Encounter of a bullet. The Encounter of a mob. The announcement of our fears may invite them into our psyche. However, we can still speak out against the threat. This reminded me of a video I made 3 years ago. It must have been inspired about the same things that are inspiring me to bring it back out again. I remember uploading it but I did very little to remind people I made it. In other words, there was hardly any promotion or tags to get it out there. UNTIL NOW.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ObyI0nvebjk

Oh, the wonders of the internet. It never goes away.

I’m only saying what a lot of people have said throughout history only that I’m sitting down for seven minutes talking into the camera the old school ay. No edits, no filters. I hope you can find something in it and share it with your friends and yes, make it go viral or at least on your timeline somewhere! 😀

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Level UP @ 3

Tempting to make a living out of a death sentence. That’s the struggle for existence. Caught in between the cycle of wanting and owning. LEVEL UP!

The abrasive wrestle between gone and coming. There is both the need to be seen in invisible clothes. LEVEL UP!

When talking to you – I’ll repeat what you said in order to indicate I was listening. If you don’t want those words thrown back at you I’ll just ’MmmHmm’ You until you get the point. LEVEL UP!

Seeing as I experienced one of the most random trips recently to Arizona and neighboring areas – it’s about time I level up! *seriously, shit has been absolutely crazy // having a car accident on my way to the airport.*

I’ve taken for granted living in Sweden for a long time. Coming back to America for a spell meant more sugar, money, and unforeseen realities all encouraging me to level up.

Settling for what has already been prepared is a danger zone. You have to see ahead like the eagle and use all of the resources made available to you. Wherever you are – it’s imperative that you level up!

010718 Dutchman Superstition Mountains-28.jpg
What do I mean by ‘Level Up’? Simply, regain your fuel. You’re spending at this very moment precious time and energy. You can covert this at your leisure but you most certainly use the wings you’ve been provided to fly away into productive manifestation.

Don’t wait for nothing. Nothing ain’t coming but something is always around the corner.

Believe that!

This fact has made me more aware of my wrestle with paranoia and the weight that comes with it. Basically, Murphy’s Law is a B*I*T*C*H*! Knowing that anything that can go wrong will go wrong – has been coughing me up and especially seeing my connection with the number 3.

For as long as I could recall numbers would follow me in some way. Whether it’s some form of ‘7’ (14,56,34) or some form of ‘9’ – it has happened to me all the time. This particular season of *2018* we are only 21 Days Into it – 3×7 – 3 has been this important number of leveling up. I’ve seen it in the most inconvenient and teaching way possible.

Which goes back to my relationship with paranoia – which isn’t always a great way for it to reveal itself back to me. Let’s say two bad things have happened to me back to back – then I start thinking another bad thing must be on its way towards me.

Although, this could also mean something really good is due to happen to balance it all out.

I want to level up but it’s hard when your mind starts making nonsense out of coincidental situations. (Or is it coincidental?)

I doubt myself and while I believe this is a very good quality it can become problematic due to not having enough faith in myself.

We should all level up, yes? Can we do this without annihilating our present convictions? Certainly!

I don’t have a particular formula to establish this – but I do know that all of us are apart of this game of connecting all of our experiences. The way in which we do is selective to our interpretative measures. If we ease on the stress and live in the moment, we’ll do better at remembering “The Birds are Singing” we don’t have to hang on to fear and stress, stress, stress, and more stress.

Thanks, Sananda.

THE TRIGGERED GENERATION

Hell Yeah, we’re Triggered.

It’s 2017 and everybody I know gets Triggered. It’s on some ASMR type of flow. Are you seeing the same shit I’m seeing?

Maybe you haven’t been aware of the plethora of ways in which trauma can be unlocked – but let me tell you: The box and key are always engaged in some kind of slippery slope of twists and turns.

Have you been living underneath a rock or something?

Every and anything can be triggering!

What’s funny about it – is that it doesn’t take much really. We’re constantly forced to deal with things and a lot of those things have childhood triggers we don’t understand yet.

Upon sudden contact – Bing!

We’re then pushed in the wrestling ring by the beast we haven’t fully seen.

Anytime I smell its fragrance – It gets a little bit closer to defeating me. I’m PRESSED because I can’t predict when my next collapse will take place?

It’s on the television. It’s on my phone. In the classroom. At work. With my family. With friends that I hang out with. I have no idea what I’m gonna see or what I hear and how this may trigger me wherever I happen to be.

Triggers are invisible forces that I can’t seem to protect myself from.

No warning. No map for closure. My anxiety is constantly multiplying because of various triggers.

These are close to home reminders that are not so easy to run away from.

I heard somebody say “Our generation should just get a grip and not be so loose on our emotions when they run through us like a flame.” I’m just laughing at that cuz IF we could pick and choose what triggered us, we wouldn’t be so damn triggered.

While we can’t control how they come, I suppose we understand those triggers. We can begin to learn how to unpack some of those various traumas.

Identifying them can be hard work tho – but it’s our responsibility.

Are we the Triggered Generation? I’d say Hell Yeah! But people long before us have had these triggers.

We’re just a bit more aware of the impact they have and there’s comfort in knowing – we ain’t all alone in this.

This piece is for my friend Loxten, which will be used for his future project.

Premonition, Paranoia, Fear or The Heart?

Can it be Premonition, Paranoia, Fear, or The Heart?

I feel something coming. It’s coming to arrest me. To lock me up inside a cell of confusion. I don’t want to get lost. I only want to be found at the bay of safety. I’m being stalked by the shadow. Everywhere I turn the light follows me but so does this shadow. I have no secret place away from this troubling feeling. I am taken away by the travels of fear and paranoia – they are driving me further into my shadow existence.

My feelings are witnessing to a Premonition that something is gonna arrive and it will leave me without reason or answer. Listening to the heart means sometimes doing the unthinkable. The heart might as well be our inward eyes. It sees what reality is for what it is made up out of. It can’t unsee what it sees. No matter how we try to put on the shades to protect ourselves from the radiation of what we see.

The longing for something better has once again returned.

I lie awake at night on fire, my core literally burns.

That familiar voice that is my own tells me to run and hide.

The only problem is that there’s nowhere to go; how can I run from my own insides?

Is it so bad to long for what’s unknown and simultaneously known?

I cry out, asking for help, asking simply to be shown.

Is it selfish that I want recognition for what it is I’ve done?

Even if I give all of the credit to the Ultimate One?

Is it selfish that I want it to be my name that is spoken?

Is it selfish that I want some appreciation, even a small token?!

It seems the only thing to do is wait until the end.

I must wait until our eternal lives are slated to begin.

Only then will these questions asked be answered with no bias.

When these notions of an ever-dwindling time are simply put behind us.

(Timeless Burning – Sylina D. Black)

This poem totally rhymes with my heart and the overall direction of this piece. Thank you again Sylina – for remaining right on time with your subject, motif, and genre.

The heart never lies because it’s beating to keep you alive. Navigating through the multilayered sound of the heart can confuse what fear, paranoia, or premonition offers. It’s best to start off with love because love returns everything to focus.

When you don’t have love to back things up, you are literally screwed. If love ain’t the backbone and foundation – you only have curse words and empty promises. Nothing ahead of you can make a clear path. You are destroyed with only memory and fainted desires to build with plastic wood. You can’t move to a safe place if love isn’t already your safe place. If you build with weak tools and equipment, eventually everything is gonna crumble and retire back to inflated wheels.

This is why love must be the champion in a relationship. If it doesn’t keep you coming back, love was never there. You believed falsely. You thought it was true only to find out you were robbed of honesty. You got hoaxed. Fooled by the enormities of emotion and pleasure.

You believed in what was real in the idea but false in reality. You gonna have to pay for this sacrifice by offering another promise. You won’t win this time, you’ll have to replenish it again. You lost but only to gain again consciousness. You gotta hit harder but only to the right target.

 

The Shadow Or The Person?

HA HA!! Life is Funny!

 Revelation is the manifestation of the truth in a bigger way outside of yourself. You may think you know, but assumptions are led by the traces of your inner thoughts. It’s an extreme of paranoia, that can make one feel they KNOW why someone is doing something. Well, You don’t really know unless you ask and be UP front about your Quest (ion). Paranoia is a dramatic interpretation of possibility. So in other words, chill out. Not everything is about you and why not throw a party for that? Most people are minding their own business, with no regard to what you are engaged in.

*IF THEY ARE CONCERNED WITH WHAT YOU HAVE IN YOUR GALLERY – WELCOME THEM TO YOUR MUSEUM.* 😀

 No need to explain what’s yours. Unless you really want to. Every day we are speaking optical illusions and with this form of communication, we are all subject to our own reality.

It’s art.

 Two people can look at the same thing and see something totally different. The exchange of implication and assumption but all can be put to rest if we just SPEAK to the SOURCE.That is if you want to, or you can make up the story in your head and settle on what you THINK they mean. Either way, the narration of what’s happening, is literally linked to the shadow and the person.